and the hits just keep on coming...

i dont know what to say here. there are wordsfeelingsthoughts whirling through my head and i just can't seem to get them out. i almost dont want to.

life hurts too much right now.

if only i could find the fast-forward key to my life so i could see that things get better...

that i get better.

i've said too much already.

why am i such a verbal slut sometimes?




blogged at 7:50 PM
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yeah.. i realize i haven't written in ages... all i wanted to say is:

i'm scared.





my heart hurts.



then when you feel yourself slipping
dig your feet in and dont let go
or surely the relentless waves will suck you in
they have no compassion, no mercy, you know...
-a. poblador.



fuck this shit.


blogged at 11:03 PM
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so yeah. strange. i havent written in a little less than a month. has a lot of stuff happened? i suppose. school is better this year. from our third floor room, i can spy on people from behind the curtain and no one would be the wiser. i have a rice cooker, which allows me to cook not only rice, but soups as well. life couldnt get much better than this..

except of course that there are classes, which kind of blows. especially sociology 10 with the professor that reminds me of my professor from my hated ge cluster class. bleh. i totally skipped class today after i turned in my paper! who's the rebel now?!?!?

i think it's me!! a-weeeeeeeee..

anyway.. i think i'm going to go now because i'm talking to one of my favorites: the kiss-my-bataclan.

lovely.


blogged at 7:59 PM
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so, i realize that i haven't written in about 2 months, but you must understand that i haven't had internet the entire time i was at home. and now i'm back at school (gasp) and so thus, here i am.

i also realize that not that many people read this (if any at all anymore) so i'm not that worried. heh

i just wanted to state that yes, i am alive.
no, i am no longer in italy.
yes, i am at ucla.
yes, i still have hope.

i fucking love downloading. yay for internet.


blogged at 10:11 PM
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yowsah... blogger seems to have changed in the few days that i've been in italy-- what the hell is up with that?
 
anyway, i am currently writing to you kids from venice. just left florence this morning and now here we are in the city of sludgy canals and rickety gondolas. heh, i jest, i jest... from what i've seen so far, venice is pretty, and tomorrow we are going to do a little more of the tourist thing.
 
so far i have seen many a vespa--have actually almost gotten run over by many a vespa, as well as smart cars. i just hope that while i'm here in venice, i dont fall into the canal and score myself a lifetime supply of infections and strange diseases... though i must say, i cant rule out completely the diseases part, considering the fact that i've gotten about half a million mosquito bites and god knows how the west nile virus is just on a rampage this summer... damn.
 
i dont remember if i've mentioned this already but... a LOT of people here have mullets! and not even just boys--girls, too! making it almost impossible to differentiate the sexes! intriguing, i know...
 
wine is interesting. i like feeling like a grown up. i'll never be as  cool though as my little sister who swirls the wine and smells it delicately before sipping it. what the hell?! am i lightyears behind or are the future generations way ahead?
 
all i know, though, is that my feet/legs desperately need a tan. my feet are actually quite freakishly tan, except for a strip of blazing white where my slipper straps are--it's actually quite hideous. ah well, 9 more days here (!!!!!).
 
ah yes... did i mention that i DESPERATELY WANT TO GO HOME NOW?! because i do. just thought i should say that.
 
but yes. a tan is a definite before i return to the states. too bad my skin is already peeling from my previous sunburn, and now my tan is going with it. can i never hope for normal skin that is more than a translucent and opalescent hue? le sigh.
 
ciao.


blogged at 2:40 PM
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greetings, californians, from (drumroll please)... ITALY! rome, italy to be exact. yep, you read it right kiddies. i am in rome right now, at an internet cafe, typing in my blog.

i just went to the vatican city today, which was quite lovely. i saw the sistine chapel in real life!!! how exciting! and st peter's basilica where i dipped crosses in holy water. fun.

and after tomorrow, we are going to be heading next to florence, and from there to venice and then to vienna and possibly budapest. the only thing killing my travelling buzz are my poor sunburned arms. le sigh.

but that's ok. at least i get to chill under the tuscan sun in a few days... get it?!?!? ... anyways, ciao!

blogged at 1:24 PM
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i'm leaving tomorrow. i finally packed yesterday, and just have to do some last minute stuff.

italy!! yowsah. definitely planning to take an assload of pictures.

am dreadfully frightened that i am going to become sunburned. badly. and then be miserable for the majority of the trip. say a prayer for me!

anyways, i'll miss everyone. i'll see you when i get back. arrivaderci and love you!

blogged at 9:42 PM
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